Super Single Mum's Blog

Life and all the shananigins!

Writers block

When I decided to get involved with NaBloPoMo and committed to write a post every day for a month, I didn’t quite think it would be so hard. I always have something to say and those who know me will know I have an opinion on everything. Trouble is I have now got complete writers block.

To say I have nothing to write about would be wrong. I have so much I would love to share but it’s all things which are not appropriate for me to blog about or things which I’m not ready to share.

So I’m after tips and inspiration! What do you do when you have writers block?

November 17, 2011 Posted by | Blogging | | Leave a comment

The Price of Anonymity

So I blog, so I don’t use my kids names, so I am anonymous, so I can say what I want! Right?

I have got back into blogging recently and as such knew that a big way to get readers is to comment on other blogs. As such I’ve been reading and to be honest have been shocked at what I have read! I haven’t commented because I have been lost for words!! It got me to wonder, what the hell do people think happens when they write a blog post. It’s viewable by anyone in the world and anonymity or not, you have no control over who sees it!

Here’s just an example of some of the stuff I have read:

  • Details of sex life
  • Moaning about partners
  • Moaning about in laws
  • Pictures of other people’s kids

Now don’t get me wrong, I am sure that all these bloggers (and I have seen examples of these on more than 1 blog so I’m not thinking of anyone in particular) have asked the other people if it’s ok to write about them, and I really hope that they have also asked other people if it is ok to publish pics of their kids. But beyond that, can we really be sure of who sees what we write? Anyone with an internet connection can see what we blog about. Yes paedophiles might read. Yes ex’s who want you back might read it. Your in laws may read what you don’t want them to see. You might tell your best mate the new position you tried last night but do you really need to tell the world your hubby was crap at it?

We all need to rant sometimes and no one blogs what they aren’t likely to say to a partner or best friend, but there are some things that are best not in the public domain, surely? Do we really live in a society where everything is public?

Personally, I write minimally about other people and try my hardest to keep them anonymous, but I know that there will always be some one out there who knows who I am talking about. So I do always ask, what do I want people I know, to know? In a strange way, I am happy with strangers to know and comment on anything because to them I’m not a real person – but I have to be prepared that what I write online may get someone’s back up, and if it does I may have to face that without the security of my laptop in front of me.

I’m not saying we shouldn’t blog, and in the main the posts on mummy blogs are what I would say “safe” in that they are personal but not infringing on others’ privacy – sometimes though I do wonder if the fact it’s all online makes us more likely to say what should remain unsaid!

What are your blogging boundaries, and do you speak up if you think other posts cross a line?

November 2, 2011 Posted by | Blogging | , | 6 Comments

A True Blogging Breakthrough

Nope this has nothing to do with stats, comments, hosts or anything like that. This is a short thank you to everyone who has offered their opinion to my last post The Reintroduction of Daddy. From reading the post you will have gathered I had been quite worried about the whole Daddy coming back after 3 months away and ending up hating me for leaving her with people she hardly remembers. Well after some direct words from some people – it was needed – I decided to just admit to myself that the only way I would get any kind of let up of anxiety was to talk to J.

 

So, tonight I rang her and we spent 20 minutes talking about the plan for Thursday and what I was happy for her to do with the girls and what she was planning if it was ok with me. There was a lot of tension in the air initial, I think the nerves were on both sides, but I had arranged to phone her so we both were prepared and there was even a little bit of laughter in the call.

 

So it has now been agreed that not only will H go, but that I will leave it entirely to their judgement as to whether she stays with them over night or if they think she will be happier to come home.

 

But my point is that without the help of completely impartial comments on my blog I probably wouldn’t have picked up the phone, I would have got more tense and that would have passed on to the kids. It would have been the start of an argument between me and Daddy and to be honest, that’s not what I want from now on. So, here’s to amicability and being the adult, here’s to the best of a not so perfect family set up, and here’s to the future!!!

April 19, 2010 Posted by | Parenting | , , , | 10 Comments

An Appeal For Feedback!

When I started my blog a few months ago, I had no idea what direction I would go with it. I got a lot of readers come over from British Mummy Bloggers who helped me get to grips with the WordPress platform as well as Twitter! I initially thought my blog would be where I talk mainly about my kids and get advice on what to do with them. Initially it was all about my girls and me being a single mum – hence the title of my blog. I have however noticed that it have evolved somewhat and talk about pretty much every aspect of my life on here.


I have recently, however, noticed that my comments have fallen off compared to what they were last month. Now I’m not too concerned because my stats show people are still coming to my site, but what does concern me is that probably only 1% or fewer are commenting on my posts. I have been a bit reluctant to blog about this fact in case people think I am being a little too egotistically assuming I am worthy of comments – but then I thought what the hell, it may be something simple I am doing wrong so asking for advice is a natural thing to do.


So I have a few questions for you all……..

  • Does the fact I chop and change between subjects put you off my blog?
  • Are you a regular reader and if so what makes you comment on some posts and not others?
  • If you’re a new reader is there anything on my site or posts that would put you off coming back?
  • Am I doing anything wrong or is this just a natural blogging dip in stats?

I would like to point out that I am very grateful for all my readers and really appreciate all the comments I do get. I also love to find new blogs so that’s another reason I like to get comments – not just for my own self indulgence!

April 17, 2010 Posted by | Blogging | , , | 8 Comments

101 Update!

So if you don’t know what my 101 is all about then check out my 101 Things in 1001 Days page! It is amazing me though, how I have been meaning to do alot of things for a while and just from writing them down and knowing I have a realistic time frame to do them, I seem to be sailing through! So here is an update on the next 5 to cross off the list:

17 – Buy a Car – I picked up my car last Saturday, of course my new job has made the car a necessity rather than a lifestyle choice, but the fact I now have the freedom to get out and about when ever I want is amazing! I actually can’t believe I have done 15 months without a car!! Now to research days out, especially as the weather is picking up!

48 – Convince someone else to take up blogging – If you haven’t already, check out Mum to J’s Blog who I not only convinced to blog but went round to help her set up her account. She’s a mum of a 4 year old boy and is about to emigrate to Australia with her husband and son and has already found a release throughBag Charm blogging, I am sure given time and once the move is out the way then there will be great stuff to come from her!

54 – Take up a new crafting hobby – I have been attending our local craft centre for the last 4 weeks and am now well and truely hooked on jewellery making. So far I have mastered phone charms, 2 styles of necklace, bag charms and earrings and could very easily spend a fortune on kit! I am confident I will blog in more detail about this in the future so watch this space!

 

85 – Buy a Diary and use it – I had always used my calendar on my phone, but had noticed recently that as this is just a generic calendar it doesn’t tell you when the bank holidays are etc. So I hung off till March and got a diary for 99p and it gets checked and written in daily! I feel so much more organised now!

96 – Completely sort out iTunes – Now this one I am proud of,My iTunes my iTunes was previously full of unknown tracks and unless it was stuff I had downloaded or put on myself (ok was all put on myself but I borrowed some various mp3 discs from a friend a while back), it was a mess! So although it took me a few 2-3 hour stints to do my tracks are all named, and if iTunes couldn’t find the artwork I managed to find pictures from elsewhere on the net and import them – I didn’t even know that was possible! So my iTunes are now ready for when I have the spare pennies to get an iPhone!

 

So there we go, a few more items crossed off and 3 of them I definitely only got done because I had included them in my 101!! Watch this space for news of more!

March 17, 2010 Posted by | My 101 Things | , , , , , | 4 Comments

Guest Day Blog – Friday 5th March

Some of my fellow Mummy Bloggers are joining in on Friday’s Guest Blog event organised by the lovely Erica at http://www.littlemummy.com but for those of you who don’t know about this, a fair few of us Mummy Bloggers have been paired up to guest blog with each other. My Guest Blogger will be revealed tomorrow when I introduce her to you all but I just wanted to record a bit about why I decided to join in and having just finished my post, how I feel about it now.

My main initial reason for being involved was to get me known to fellow mummy bloggers. I have been blogging here for just under a month now, whilst I have got out into the blogging community through British Mummy Bloggers and Twitter I am always looking for new ways, like this, to get my blog noticed. However, it is also a way for me to find new blogging friends. The wonderful Mum I have been paired with I have never come across before. Straight away I have found a new blog to read and we have both been blogging for around the same time too, so already it’s a positive experience for me!

I have just written my blog post for the big day! I have never felt nervous about writing my blog posts before, but the fact this is going on someone elses site has reallymade me think more about what I write!!! Now yes that is a good thing but it also makes me worry what I write for myself is utter drivvle!!!! I just hope come Friday everything goes to plan!!!

For anyone who hasn’t taken part this time, I would definitely recommend it. It is part of the learning curve and I have found it makes you look at your blog in a different way, whether you have blogged for years or just started that is always a good thing. So until Friday……….Good Luck to everyone else who is taking part in this!

March 3, 2010 Posted by | Blogging | , , | 2 Comments