Super Single Mum's Blog

Life and all the shananigins!

Barmy about my Boys – Guest Day Post

Guest Post Day has come round again thanks to Erica at Littlemummy.com and this time I am pleased to announce my guest blogger is Ramblemum, so without further ado it’s over to Ramblemum:

 

This is my first guest post day so please be easy on me! I am glad to be paired with Super Single Mum as she has been able to help me with this process.We decided as I have all boys and she has all girls we would do a comparison, so here is my perspective on having all boys.

 

I recently almost got thrown out of Asda. It was nothing really to do with the boys behaviour (for once) Albert was at playgroup, Stanley and Ernest were both asleep in the buggy. I was walking round minding my own business and an old lady peeked in at Ernest,

 

Her: Awww two boys?

Myself : Yes, well three actually, the other is at playgroup

Her: Oh well try again maybe you will be lucky next time and get a girl

Now this is not an unusual remark and normally I would let it go so I could run after Albert and stop him filling the trolly but as the two were all asleep and I had half an hour to kill I took the decision to follow it up

Myself: I think I’m I am lucky now thank you (In a very sarcastic tone)

Her: No need to be rude!

Myself: I think insinuating I am not lucky to have my boys is rude

 

The conversation continued until a manager asked us to take it outside and we both slunk off.

 

I am very protective of my boys, when I was pregnant with Albert everyone thought I would have a boy, we thought we would have it at the weekend and true we did. With Stanley again everyone thought boy, he was and born at the weekend at night the same as Albert. So with Ernest we joked that he would be a boy born at the weekend at night and true to form he was! No one could believe it and now everyone thinks I can produce to order, Will this he has super ‘man’ sperm, I think we must have a predictable sex life.

 

Life with three boys born within three years is loud, dirty and fun and I am not sure what people think is wrong with that. I get asked if I would like to continue to have a girl or wish I had one but I really do not think I am missing anything. At the moment I think there is not much difference, its when they get older that the differences come. I am hoping it will be easier having boys. I have a guilty fantasy of other friends having arguments with their teenage girls whilst my boys are hidden in their rooms looking at porn or on their computers, then again most probably looking at porn on their computers. Whatever, I am getting some peace.

 

The most difficult thing about having boys is buying things, retailers are still very much on the side of girls. Clothes especially, I am sick of zoo/farm/jungle/safari baby clothes and tractor/car based toddler clothes. Formal clothes are a nightmare, the selection is minimal and very predictable as opposed to the rails and rails of dresses available for girls. Do not get me wrong, there are a lot of hideous girls stuff out there, billowing polyester fairy princess dresses and lelli kelly shoes to start but at least there is a choice. Boys toys tend to be educational or skills based as opposed to creative but that is ok as my boys have a range of toys. Stanley is getting a dolly, push chair and tea set for his birthday as gender specific does not happen here, well we do not, I cannot vouch for what others get them.

 

Emotionally I would like my boys to stay as close to me as they are now but I do understand that boys tend to rely less emotionally on their mothers as they get older. Maybe I can replace them with a very girly needy dog once this happens, I jest-Will hates dogs. In all honesty at the end of the day as long as they are happy and healthy I will be a happy Mummy.

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May 28, 2010 Posted by | Guest Blog Post | , , , | 3 Comments

What I am afraid of………

 

 

Thanks to Magic Mummy I have been tagged in this Meme and I’ve not come across this one before so here goes…….

As I am sure you can guess, it’s basically to open up about what we are afraid of and I have to admit it’s not as easy as it looks. I mean, yeah I don’t like spiders and I am definitely afraid of big ones. Then there is heights, I once got stuck in our local soft play centre because I was determined to get to the top, but climbing up the mesh turret I made the fatal mistake of looking down and froze. I couldn’t move even though small children were climbing over me to get past!

I’m also not keen on flying. I have to be perfectly honest and say it’s because I don’t understand it. I do, I have been taught how lift works and how aeroplanes fly, but it seems weird to me that something so big can fly and it scares the heebie jeebies out of me. But then looking at this one closer I also don’t particularly like travelling by train, or in a car that someone else is driving. So I think to be honest one of my biggest fears is the fear of not being in control. Even in every day life, I like to be in control of my life and my decisions. I feel safe if I am in control.

Oh and my other main fear is the fear of growing old alone. I am a happy single mum right now. I love my life and I love my girls but one day they will grow up and leave home, maybe get married, live with someone, what ever they decide. It does worry me that I will then be completely on my own. And by that age will I have it in me to go out and find someone. I don’t see myself as being single forever, but then I didn’t see myself as being divorced. It links back to my other fear though, I hope that if I am still single by then, it is through choice because then I am in control of it!!!

So there we have it, no weird phobias of fears for me. My parents say I am scared of sock puppets, I’m not scared of them I just don’t “get” them!! But no, buttons, Velcro and bananas don’t worry me!!!

So it’s over to you, I know I am meant to tag people to do this, but I’m going to open up the floor……..if you want to open up about your fears, grab the award and write your post. Add your link to the comments so I can come and take a peek!!!

May 24, 2010 Posted by | meme | , , , , | 1 Comment

Plum Baby Review

The lovely people at Plum Baby recently asked me to review some of their scrummy toddler biscuits and I of course jumped at the chance. I hadn’t tried these with H before and she has recently gone off biscuits so it was interesting to see what she would think.

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I received the Milky Moons and the Oat Rounds and was very impressed. These biscuits are shaped for little hands and are great for teething toddlers as they are quite substantial. Unlike “normal” biscuits, they don’t just crumble in a toddlers mouth. H did however find them a little hard and I had to break them up in a dish for her, but once I did that she loved them. And of course knowing they are targeted at her age range, I know her needs are taken into account.

 

And I also have to admit I really like the oat rounds too, which means we can both eat the same snack, as H, like many toddlers of her age, wants what other people have got!

 

I also love the fact the Oat Rounds come in handy twin packs which is great for picnics, pack ups, or just to have in your handbag for when your out and about. These biscuits get a thumbs up from me and from H, so go on and give them a go!

 

The folks over at Plum Baby have given me 15 samples of yummy 4 grain porridge to give away to my lovely readers.

porridgePlum Baby is all about real food for babies and not just baby food and all the products are made with the highest quality organic ingredients. They offer babies a taste of what’s to come and are full of nutrients and nothing artificial.

 

To enter, simply go to the Plum Baby newsletter  (http://www.plum-baby.co.uk/plum-mums/plum-mums-sign-up) and sign up using the code “Super Single Mum” – and the winners will be chosen at random in 7 days time.

 

Check out www.Plum-Baby.co.uk and discover more yummy products from the Plum Kitchen.

May 20, 2010 Posted by | Product Reviews | , , , , , | 2 Comments

That Feeling of Contentment

I’ve been feeling a bit weird lately. I can’t explain it, but like something isn’t quite right. I couldn’t put my finger on it and so could do nothing about it. All is ok with me and the girls and  although Dad is back on the scene now after his 3 months away, there are no issues in that area either.

 

This weekend I started to feel really edgy though. And what was making it worse is the fact I was getting wound up about not knowing what was making me feel anxious and not quite right. My patience with the girls was at an all time low and I had the urge to just curl up and do nothing all weekend.

 

Something is bugging me and I wish I could put my finger on what………because when I feel like this for no reason something always ends up happening, like I know something is coming and can do nothing to stop it and not in a good way! So, today I have had a short day at work and came home and started blitzing the house. By that I mean completely going mad with bin bags. I have sorted H’s wardrobe for the 1st time since we moved here a year ago. I have finally sorted and thrown out my old clothes, of which I have been hoarding for about 5 years. I cooked the bolognaise for tea before I picked up the girls and even found time to sit and have a read of my new book.

 

There is still something wrong though……I feel good at having achieved a lot, and the girls have both come home in great moods and my patience is back, I’m still waiting for something though. Everything makes me worry at the minute and I don’t like it!!!

Do you ever go through times like this and how do you deal with it??

May 17, 2010 Posted by | Me, myself and I | , , , , , | 2 Comments

Dead And Gone

No, no don’t worry – no one has died, well, no one real anyway!!!

 

I’m talking about the book I last read! I finished it last night and Dead and Gone is the 9th Book in the True Blood series, the final one currently available. So I thought I would take some time to review the series so far…..

 

If you haven’t read the books, you may know a bit about them from the TV series. Currently showing Season 2 on FX and approaching the release of Season 3 in the states it has been very popular! Why? Well it’s more than Vampires in my opinion!

 

The title True Blood takes it’s name from the synthetic blood that has made it possible for the Vampire community to “come out of the coffin” so to speak. The story follows Sookie Stackhouse, a waitress from Bon Temps. We start the story with Sookie, and the small town, receiving it’s 1st Vampire since they came out 2 years previously. But Sookie is no ordinary waitress, she is also telepathic and is drawn towards Bill the Vampire because she realises she can’t read his mind and relishes the silence that radiates from him.

 

As you can imagine, there are lots of twists and turns and Sookie and Bill form a friendship that turns to love and sees Sookie running for her life at the end of the 1st book, Dead Until Dark. But if you think this is just another Vampire Romance, think again. There is something in this series for everyone, although it’s definitely not for the younger ones! A lot of comparisons are made between Sookie and Bella of Twilight, but I am not going to do that. I personally think both stories are fantastic but the ONLY comparison that can be made is that both contain Vampires and Shapeshifters. There the similarities end.

 

True Blood is currently 9 books, with Book 10 – Dead in The Family – released on June 11th 2010. The fact that the series is so long and has such avid followers is, in my opinion, down to the fact it contains a lot of details. The characters are developed right through the series and and there is always a new twist. But, the thing I love is that each of the books is a story in it’s own right. I personally have read them all, in order. But if you wanted to dip in and out you could. I would recommend reading the lot though because that was the authors intention.

 

As with the TV series, these books contain action, romance, sex (a friend of mine referred to the TV series as “Vampire Porn”!), comedy and an underlying story of life. It covers the changing relationships between the whole community of Bon Temps and I for one am now counting down to the release of the next book! Oh and the arrival of Season 2 DVD which is released today and on it’s way from Amazon!

 

If you’re put off by the word Vampire, please don’t be, I would recommend this series to everyone who enjoys a good dip into sheer escapism. The series even made my cousin ask me whether I thought in a few years the Vampires may really come out………….I love it on paper, but real life is good the way it is! Let me know what you think if you have read these!

May 17, 2010 Posted by | Book Reviews | , , , | 2 Comments

Grandma’s House

Inside these walls a lot has happened,

Memories that aren’t just for me!

The echoes of a family, the generations, the years.

As a child these walls to me were home, I remember the words

Going home for the week”

To visit the family, rest, laugh and cry.

I never lived in that house, although I stayed over a lot

If a place could hold the meaning of love this is it.

For marriages, christenings and funerals alike,

we’ve congregated, celebrated and mourned

We’d take out the old, and bring in the new,

eat mushy peas and mint sauce as the years passed.

The women in the kitchen, the men in the room, the kids mingling and being told to move

The dogs that always got special treats, even though no dog had lived there!

Now those walls sit empty

Not one of us want to let go

But what are walls without the people that make them?

Grandma’s House

It’s not the same without Grandma, life and age have meant that she’s with us in our homes.

No matter what happens from here, when the time comes I pray the echo’s of the years and generations shout through

And I hope the same joy is blessed on the next family

Look after it and it will look after you!

xxx

 

May 15, 2010 Posted by | Home | , , , | 3 Comments

Hiding Behind the Laptop!

I was thinking yesterday how it’s really strange how I will blog about anything yet in real life it’s different! I will talk about anything on here, within reason of course! I recently took part in the Meme telling the whole world what I keep in my handbag! Yet yesterday at work when I lost my phone in it, I was really conscious about emptying the contents out on the table in front of my colleagues! In reality though any of them could have had the guided tour on my blog!

 

It did make me wonder though, do we loose too many inhibitions when we are hiding behind the laptop? I talk openly about my thoughts and feelings on here – mainly because once the kids are in bed I am sat on my own with just my virtual web friends to talk through things that are on my mind! I enjoy letting people into my mind and seeing what goes on in my world but is it always a good thing to be so forthcoming with information in such a public and in some ways uncontrolled way.

 

Facebook is the same, I’m no where near as bad as I have been, but it has been known for me to post status updates 15 to 20 times a day. In some respects that’s not as bad because it’s only friends who can view it, all 200 hundred odd of them some of which are, again, “virtual” friends! And don’t get me started on Twitter, I’m not on there all the time but everything I post on there (except direct messages) is viewable by anyone in the world. You can even have your tweets show up in Google searches.

 

It’s how our society is these days. The internet is a fantastic way of sourcing information and keeping in touch, but it’s also a haven for those strange people who like to stalk others or steal identities! When I set up this blog I made a decision not to name my children or myself, not to give away where in the world I am or to post pictures of me and my girls. That didn’t last long. Ok my girls are still nameless, but I have used pictures and joined things like The Secret Post Club, which means people learn more about me.

 

I guess it’s impossible to be invisible, but what I am trying to say is that sometimes I forget just how public the net can be and wonder if maybe, sometimes, the fact we are sat in our comfortable, safe homes, we forget the net isn’t just what’s on our screen! Do you ever worry you’re saying too much?

May 11, 2010 Posted by | Blogging | , | 6 Comments

Warburtons Have Some New Arrivals!

I was recently contacted about trying out some new products from Warburtons, me being the snack-a-holic I am, jumped at the chance and I wasn’t disappointed.

snack-a-doodleThe first of the two products are called SnackADoodle, a wholegrain based snack. These are low calorie snack, and the best way I can describe them is a cross between rice crackers and crisp bread style products. I have to say I wasn’t blown away but that’s mainly because I’m not a big fan of this type of thing. They are however, satisfying, a bag is just the right size and whilst the cheese flavour ones are very cheesy, the chilli ones are really flavoursome. A great low calorie alternative for party nibbles and go great with dips. I personally wouldn’t buy these but that’s not because there is anything wrong with them, just not my thing!

 

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What does get my thumbs up and I will definitely be buying once released, are the ChippedyDoDaa pita based snacks. Imagine a pita bread, cut into triangles, flavoured and toasted and that’s what these are. Very filling, again the bags are exactly the right size. The sea salt and vinegar flavour are my favourite. Again these are great for a mid morning snack, lunch on the go or for nibbles when entertaining. What amazed me though is the fact that they actually tasted home made. 

 

So if your after an alternative to crisps, give these a go. They are both going to be available through Londis and Budgens stores and here’s hoping that eventually they will be available else where too!

May 10, 2010 Posted by | Product Reviews | , , | 2 Comments

Is our Parliament Well Hung?

I’ve done it. I’ve just been and voted. This time I have done it for me. The first time I voted I was 18 and really didn’t have much of a clue. This is the only General Election I have voted in, truly believing I had made an informed choice. As part of my 101 things in 1001 days, I said I was going to do research so I knew who to vote for. Boy, did I research! I read all the three major parties manifesto’s a few times, and had them favourited so I could drop back into them whenever I thought of something else. I spoke openly to anyone and everyone who would listen about my undecided vote. I got into some really good debates both in “real” life and in the virtual world of the net. All the parties had some things I agreed with. All the parties had things I didn’t agree with. All the party leaders had me nodding along, then shouting abuse during the Leader’s Debates. I changed my mind sooooo many times!

 

So, ok you all want to know how I voted? Now I know some people are very cagey about their vote. No-one has the right to expect people to say who they vote for. It’s a personal decision. Now I have cast my vote, and many people will have voted by the time they read this, my little bit of political waffle will make no difference in the grand scheme of things because we the public are deciding right now, up and down the country, who will be our next Government.

 

I am proud to say that I voted Labour. Ok, ok stop shouting at me while I tell you why. I voted Labour because I turned 18 in time to vote in the election where the Tory reign ended and Labour came to power. My whole adult life has been spent in a Labour run Britain. I have never been unemployed for more than a few months when moving house, apart from through choice after having my children. I receive Tax Credits which enable me to work as a single parent, without which I would have no choice but stay at home. Both my children have Trust Funds. Ok I am the one who pays into them but if the Government hadn’t made them compulsory then I for one probably still wouldn’t have set them up off my own back. Ok, you cry, what about the credit crunch? Well, I don’t think we can blame a global recession on one person and Gordon Brown was not to blame. We all spent too much, took advantage of interest free credit and lived in a material world. Hang on, that’s a song, it was out in the 80’s, Material World, ah yes – the glorious yuppie 80’s where everyone wanted the latest gadgets and lived in debt. Our economy has never recovered from that, and back then it wasn’t Brown, it was Bloody Thatcher! See, for all my childhood the country was under a Conservative government and my memory is that times were harder then than I have had during the Credit Crunch. There was no spare cash in the household budget for extra’s and treats really were treats.

 

The other big reason I have voted Red, is down to the Sure Start Children’s Centre’s across the countries which face closure if the Conservatives come to power. I have said it before and will say it again, my local Children’s Centre saved me from going down a very dark and bleak road when I had H. It also saved a lot of others. Labour brought them in and Labour will keep them. The Conservatives will keep some but many face closure. I am now in a line of work that involves the Children’s Centre in a massive way and I would hate to loose them both from the eyes of a Mother and a Professional.

 

I’ve never voted Labour before, I have to be honest here. I have voted Conservative and Liberal Democrat in the past and do believe in a lot of the Lib Dem campaign, but the way our voting system works in Britain today, Lib Dem would never get in, so my support is with Labour because I am confident that it’s the lesser of two evils! Election campaigns tend to focus on the bad, I have looked at the good that Labour have done and I have to say, my life would be very different now if we’d been under a different Government, and not in a good way! I’m holding out for a Hung Parliament if I am honest, with another General Election within 2 years. Some say this would be a death sentence for our country, but actually I think it could be a good short term option!

Have you voted yet?

May 6, 2010 Posted by | Uncategorized | Leave a comment

Nature, Nurture or Neither?

The argument is always there isn’t it? Nature or nurture, which is biggest at play in how we as people are shaped. Sometimes though I do think it can be neither!! What’s prompted my train of thought I hear you all cry……..well maybe your not all thinking that but I’m going to tell you anyway!

 

I have a younger brother, he is 5 1/2 years younger than me and other than bread and gravy with Sunday dinner (I was never allowed it, he was!!!!), we were brought up very similarly and were taught the same values by our parents. Thing is though, we share gene’s and we were brought up the same yet we are so different. In the main I am talking about how we do things here rather than personality.

 dinner table by chatirygirl @ Flickr.com

Ok, take, for instance, table manners. I remember as a child that we had to stay at the table until everyone had finished and we were either told to leave, or we asked and were given permission to leave the table. The only times I remember being excused before everyone finished, was if we were ill. I think that is the way it should be. That way no one feels rushed or abandoned just because they eat slower. I have therefore passed this down to my children. I admit I leave the table while they eat pudding, as I do the washing up, but can still see them and have a conversation with them, and B knows she doesn’t get down until I clean up H and get her down from the table.

 

Thing is, when we go to my parents for tea, my brother leaves when he is done. He sits, eats his dinner, takes his plate to the kitchen and disappears. On Sunday’s if the girls are with us, he stays at the table mainly because we asked him to due to B asking why he got to leave the table. Now, it’s their house and my parents are fine with him doing so, but today as I sat having eaten dinner, and my brother was sat on the sofa reading the paper, and Mum and Dad were still eating. I found myself thinking that I would never ever leave the table while people are still eating! Not at my own house, not at someone else’s house. I would just feel as if I was being very rude. Now this maybe because at my house I’m the hostess. At other people’s houses I am the guest. Whereas my brother lives at home, but he isn’t the host, as I am sure he wouldn’t do it at a friends.

 

What rules do you have for meal times? Do you eat at the table as a family? Have you brought any rules with you from childhood into your life as a parent? I’d love to know what your views are!

May 2, 2010 Posted by | Parenting | , | 10 Comments